The Caregivers Lament


Caregivers are those people who help those who can no longer can take of themselves alone. Now talking about a simplistic definition of something that is so much more complicated on so many levels. For the purpose of this post I think it’s best to look at what most people consider the most common definition of a caregiver of those who help take care  of a loved one who ( in many cases) are elderly. Lets make this clear being a caregiver is a full time job. There are no ” days off” to just relax. It simply doesn’t happen even if there are times that you are not physically with that person. They are constantly on your mind. There are support groups in some areas but in many there simply aren’t. Like most things in life there are some that are good. It’s important to understand that as a caregiver you will walk this journey alone even tho there may be people around. As Johnny Cash says in that song ” You’ve got to walk that lonesome valley you have to walk it by yourself”. It’s not fun and the sooner you realize it the better. As a caregiver you will do things in a split second and 5 minutes later you with be upset with yourself about what you just did. Then people on the receiving end can’t figure out what just happened. I know I did that about a week or so ago on my LinkedIn site. I sent a couple of people a note saying I was closing my account and within  couple of hours I got thinking about it and changed my mind and got it open again. It’s a lonely walk plain and simple. You will get angry at the one you are the person you are caring for and at yourself. Being a caregiver is a grind. You start your days thinking about what is the condition of the one you are caring for and your whole day is built around that with the realization in could change at any moment.  Then this question comes up? Who can I trust? Then somehow you have to find time for yourself. In your heart you know where this is going to end and in many cases that is what grinds at you the most.

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